why getting married

Marriage I think is probably the biggest commitment ever.
you have to be ready for everything that may surprise you
you may suddenly get pregnant
you can no longer flirt around
you may realize some things when it's too late
people know you have lost your virginity
you can never turn it back this time

you can never undo a marriage, neither ask for a new spouse
there is no warranty in a marriage

sure, everybody wants a happy marriage. a happy family.

but you see, the problem with me is that, 
I've seen and met too many unhappy people with unhappy marriages.
some are literally close to me, they're in my house.

I know how things work after you get married.

some are really lucky enough to marry their first loves but many aren't.

I've seen what would happen when we marry people we don't want to marry.

maybe we want to marry them at first but after few months or years or few kids the marriage is no longer the marriage we wished for when we were dreamers.


things change, of course, but it's too much of a risk.

it's the risk I'm not taking.
I'm saying this because honestly the one marriage in my house is seriously the unhappy one.
it affects me so much.

I may end up not getting married but that's okay because I have a lot in my mind of things I want to do before I die and probably won't even be fully done until I die.


so I'll be okay.
I'm just not into this marriage thing, it's just too risky.