'cause everynight I'm talking to the moon..

It has been 17 years since then.

And I've learnt too many of the things a growing-up girl shouldn't have.

Guess I'm too vulnerable.

But if I am given the chance to turn back time, go back and make everything better..

I guess I wouldn't want it.

These experiences, bitter and sweet..I can't find anywhere else.

I can't find in lives of anyone else.

If I go back and change everything, I won't have these experiences in my head

and these experiences are the ones that I will tell to the public when I'm an author someday.

If I lose them, what else am I supposed to tell to my readers. Kan.

Not everybody enjoys happy story right.

If people want happy story then they have Disney.

For me..I love realistic things.

If I write a story, I want it to be as real as it can possibly be.

My family story is the most realistic story.

We're not a happy family.

We are far from it.

This house we're living in..it keeps so many secrets that I believe it has been suffering from critical headache and with just one more fight between the family, it can collapse abruptly.

I feel like we can make a museum out of it.

Full of stories of this family.

Okay. Enough of that.

Experiences..heh.

You have no idea what I have in mind. Too many.

You didn't go through what I did.

I've gone through so many things throughout my life.

People just jump into conclusion like I'm boastful and stuffs because I hardly smile but..

THEY DON'T KNOW ME. So how could they.

Number one, I'm a smiley.

Number two, you're wrong in every shit you say about me.

Number three, I'm a fool now for even giving a damn.

So I'll stop worrying about what you think of me, and continue walking my way.

And I'll put a smile on my face and never tear it, you know why?

'Cause I know how much it gives you hell.   :)

A reminder for you and for me myself:

"If you will call your troubles experiences, and remember that every experience develops some latent force within you, you will grow vigorous and happy, no matter how adverse you circumstances may seem to be."

Btw, in whatever you do..remember that 

You have your people with you, and even if you have no one, there's God.